I haven't done this in FOREVER!!

It has been so long since I last posted a blog. I just felt as though I didn't really have the time to sit and write about things that already occured in my life. Recently, I have a had an urge to start a journal and thought "why not just start my blog back up?" so here I am. Lets see if I can keep up with it this time. Maybe I can even get alittle better at capturing moments with my camera, although, all I do is work so I'm rarely anywhere but there.

So much has happened this year, but I will write about a few things that have touched me and helped to make me be the new person I am today!






My husband & I have now suffered through our 6 baby being lost. We have finally come to the conclusion that we are meant to have our family of 3. Xavier was sent to us to be our one and only baby. I always NEVER thought I would be able to say I was okay with having no more babies, but at this point I would rather live to see Xavier grow and have his own family! I can't continue to chance leaving this world behind because I was selfish. I know that I will always look at pregnant women and wonder why I can't have that...I will always see newborn babies and smile with a tear forming in my eye. At the end of the day, I just want what is best for my son and my husband, that is me being here.

We recently lost a great friend of ours just this past week. We had become alittle distant over the past fews years. He did his own thing and of course we did the family thing. Wayne had recently reached out to both Ricky & I for advise and help. Of course we were both there for him in our own ways to help him, talk to him and of course just to listen to him. He was a deeply hurt person who just wanted to do best for his son. Unfortunately, no matter what you said to him, he never felt better about himself. I received a text from Ricky that he had taken his life and I felt as if I couldn't breathe. This man always seemed so happy, always had a smile on his face. Just goes to show that looks are deceiving!! There is not a day that goes by I don't think about him, miss him and picture his face. R.I.P my Red Lobster.. your Tasty Kakes will miss you!!